You brought in the new year with six teeth, sore gums and a nasty ear infection to boot. It was frustrating to see you so miserable but you still managed to smile, dance, clap and enjoy the moments where things weren't so bad. I think we all can take from that sort of attitude. You're amazingly tough, my little girl. I brought in the new year with hope... and a slew of doctor's appointments blood draws and a somewhat rough draft plan from my immunologist on how they'll pursue to boost up my immune system. I haven't felt 'well' in weeks but just like you, I'm learning to smile in those moments where things aren't so bad and enjoy fun with you while I can. You've been spending a lot more time with daddy and really, you have him wrapped around your finger. It makes me feel guilty that I have a hard time keeping up with you, let alone keeping up with myself... but I am happy that you two are bonding and he comes to help out. I'm moody, we get into petty arguments... you hate it and I'm sorry. I will do better at being more tolerant and kind but there's one thing I was never good at... and that's being sick.
I have to tell you, kiddo, your spirit never ceases to impress me. You blow my mind every day and your independence both saddens me and fills me with infinite awe. You're becoming less of a baby, you're my baby and you're growing up. You're clever, expressive, you love animals and you have a very unique taste. You're quite particular and I love that. You are dabbling into your first steps, you're quite rolly and you're an expert at crawling backwards. You know what else? You're going to be a YEAR old!!! (Next month.) It's another bittersweet thing for me. I can remember cradling you in my womb like it was yesterday, holding your tiny pink body and rocking you while I nursed and sang to you.
You have a beautiful smile and I know already, that you have a beautiful heart. Lately, you like to kiss your stuffed animals. Grandpa got you a talking tauntaun for Christmas and he's called 'Doug'. I'm quite positive you were trying to say 'dog' but 'Doug' he is and 'Doug' he will remain.
You still 'goya goya goya' vigorously when you're tired and you like to touch the soft part of your blanket or rub my arm.
You talk a lot, a lot of gibberish but you can identify things and people. You have started to say 'bahh' for bath and will nod when I ask if you'd like to take a bath. You LOVE to bathe, you're also becoming quite courageous by sticking parts of your face into the water. You like to splash, play with toys and despite my disapproval, I believe that you're going to be a daredevil, like I was... you try to climb out of the tub and explore things that could cause potential injury without regard or fear.
You love praise and you like to clap when you like something. You also like to wave goodbye when you think somebody is leaving or when a tv show ends.
You've started to sing along to things and it's so inconceivably adorable.
You respond with made up sentences and nods, and sometimes with little hand gestures to emphasize the attitude you're trying to convey.
You still really like to draw, color and paint... I know I'm biased when I say this but... GENIUS.
You roll your eyes. (I don't encourage this but I find it very difficult not to laugh. STOP BEING SO CUTE. EVEN YOUR TANTRUMS ARE DARLING.)
I hate to say it... but you kind of get cuter every day. How is that even possible?
I love you, bb. You're always going to be my baby... even with the painful reality that you're growing up every day... I hope that I will always be one of your best friends just as you are mine.
Please stop growing so fast.
Love always,
Mama
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